SECOND CHANCE
I was scared of the dark. It was unpleasant when you fully realized that you were all alone with no one’s beside you at all. In the four-times-five bedroom, I begged to God another chance for me to be passed through. Another time of joy and happiness. It was so damn horrible to remember that the one usually with you wasn’t there anymore, dying. It was so regretful to know that everything that I’d done in the past was all in vain. I did nothing good. All was wrong. It hurt my surrounding. It hurt my-beloved-person-should be in the whole world.
I was stuck in the moment for a while. The flashback of the past came up in front of me. It was like watching the film in the cinema. It was so clear ‘till I believed that it wasn’t dream, imagination, or so, but it was a real film, a story.... about my own life.
***
“Don’t you ever listen to me, dear?” Mom said in her low voice, hopeless.
I sighed, “Why should I?” I answered annoyingly to her. I walked away from her. Leaving her with her tears dropped on her face.
"Mia...," she called me as I touched the handle. "Maybe I am not a mother you always expected. But you should know that I will always love you ‘till my time comes..." She sounded convincing me. But I absolutely didn’t care at all. I smiled at him bitterly and went outside.
“Are you fun with that? Are you satisfied with all the things you’ve done to your mother? Are you happy now?” Sena asked me in a hard way.
I stared at her as my answer
“Come on, Mia, grow up! You are not a kid anymore. You are a big girl now. You should ...”
“Don’t preach me about ‘grow up’ thing please... I surely understand about that! Who are you talking about that in front of me! I thought you are my best friend?” I interrupted her. I couldn’t hear any suggestions at the moment.
“Mia... it is not all about you, you know... you don’t even know about their real problem, right? It is just your own perception. Don’t judge your mom that way. It’s not fair!” Sena persuaded me. I knew that she wanted to calm me down. But in the time like this, I didn’t think that it would work right.
“Sen, don’t you forget who causes all of this mess to me now! My Dad went away... having another family! He left me! Just because my stupid mom cheating on him with that silly boy!” I yelled, full of anger.
Sena kept in silent for a while. She took a deep breath and exhaled it. She was like having a difficult time at the present. She was little annoyed that I discussed it over and over again. I knew it from her face.
“Sen, I’m sorry I talk about it again, but it’s killing me, you know how I really feel...”
“Mia, I couldn’t stand it anymore. You are different person now. I can’t handle it anymore. I hope you can stop what you’re doing now. You push yourself too hard and this ridiculous thing about revenge... you know I don’t agree with you about it. So stoopp it...”
“Are you kidding me? You know what you’re saying, right? I can’t believe you talk to me like that! You know how terrible it is for me... you...”
“I’m sick of it Mia. I’m tired... I’m leaving...”
Sena got up and walked away. She left me all alone.
***
I felt sorry for what I’ve done this evening to Sena. It disturbed my mind. And I could do nothing right. I could understand that she probably felt bored about my problem. And I knew that my action now irritated her. She was kind of a girl who was so innocent and calm. She was so fragile and my change was so sudden and it was hard for her to be getting used to it.
I knocked her door, but there was no sound at all. So I opened it directly. I was so close to Sena’s family and I often be here, so I considered that this house as my second family.
I walked inside the house. It was empty. I wanted to apologize to her. I ...
I stopped walking. I was so shocked of what I saw in front of me. Sena and... They were sitting in the sofa, hand in hand, embracing each other. I squeezed my hand so tight. I wanted to yell but it hurt to see your boyfriend and best friend were cheating on behind you. It hurt a lot.
“Wilda...an??”
The man looking at me in shock, trying to figure out explanation for it. “Mi..aa...” He got up and standing right away. He was looking at me, knowing nothing to do. He was trying to say something, but there were no words came up from his mouth.
“Is it what you two doing behind my back? Is it...” I couldn’t handle my sob. It was coming out unconsciously. I was so sad and disappointed.
“Mia, listen to me. It is not like you are thinking. It....” He stopped, couldn’t find any appropriate answer to say.
“Sen, can i believe my eyes? Is it true?” I was looking at them in despair. Wildan started to approach me, but Sena held his right hand and he stopped. They were looking at each other. “Sen...”
“Let’s get this thing right. She has to know the truth. It is the time.” Sena assured Wildan. And he just nodded his hand to say his agreement.
Sena looked at me and started to say the thing I’ve never expected. They were having an affair behind me for all this time. They were cheating on me. It was something awful. What did they think? How can be they possiby doing this?
“So, how long it has been?” I asked with such painful feeling in my soul.
“Since you be different, Mia. You are acting wild... and...”
“Stop it!” I begged. I couldn’t hear it any longer. I was still crying.
“Miaa...” Wildan was trying to touch my shoulder, “I.. we are so sorry, we are...”
Suddenly, all I knew that I was running, I was all wet. I did’t care both of them running behind me and calling out my name. I wanted to hide now. I wanted to stop the pain. I just ran. Running away...
In front of me, my Dad opened the door. I wanted his love and care now. But...
“What are you doing here?” A beautiful young man greeted me roughly.
“Where is my Dad?” I asked. It was so cold. I needed his affection to make me feel warm.
“Don’t you ever daqre to look for him again! You have to know your place. You are nothing for him. Go to your mother. Your dad is mine now!!!” the woman named Ayu that was my father’s new wife. I didn’t like him. She was so mean and cruel. She was a bitch.
“I want to see him!” I pushed her away. I walked inside the house. And I called out my dad at loud, but he wasn’t here.
Ayu grabbed my hand to stop me. “Hey... listen! Your dad doesn’t care about you anymore! Do you get that!” she pointed her finger to my face.
“I don’t believe you!”
“Hah... don’t you ever think about why he never comes to your house and see you? Doesn’t your mother tell you why?” she acted so annoyingly.
I didn’t say a word.
She laughed. “I bet she didn’t. I’ll tell you why...”
***
The film stopped. It was dark again. The film of my life was end. I cried at loud.
When I came home, my neighbor was there, she was telling me that my mother fell down in the stairs. She was taken to hospital. My cellphone was off and no one could call me.
I couldn’t imagine living in the world without her. I was so ashamed of myself. I wasn’t able to go to the hospital. I wasn’t there to see her now. I was afraid that something bad would happen. I thought about her so wrong. I thought that it was because of her my dad leaving his family. But the fact was that my Dad was the one who had an affair with another woman. He accused Mum for being unfaithful but the truth was otherwise. My mother kept it in secret. She didn’t want me to hate Dad. It was almost one year and I hurt her so long...
Please, God.... I am sorry for what I’ve done... please... don’t take her away from me... give me another chance.... i want to show my regret and my love for her... it is all my fault... I will do anything for her... pleaseee....
My tears started to fall down faster and faster.
Kriiiinnggg.........................
“Hello?”
“Mia? I have a good news. Your mother awakes...”
I dropped the phone. I was so glad. I was so thankful. I was speechless. “Thanks God! Thanks for the second chance! I will make things right from now on.” I promised to myself.
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